1 Monthly Task to Launch Your Relationship to the Next Level
Every relationship has stresses, bills, important trips/dates, anniversaries, and millions of things to remember. Add kids to the mix and it intensifies everything (but also makes your life 100000X better). One thing Roldy and I have done over the last year or so is have monthly meetings with each other. No kids – no interruptions. Just him – me- and a random coffee shop.
Each meeting goes differently but there are a few main points we hit every time.
Finances
We always go over and discuss our budget and finances. We use Ramsey solutions every dollar and connect our bank accounts. It has been a life saver because it is really easy to use and it is a great accountability tool. What did last month look like? Did we stick to our budget or did we spend $1000 on date nights? (this has actually happened… as funny as it is it can be nuts when you realize how much money you are spending). Then we evaluate what we went over on and adjust accordingly for the following month. Are there any expenses the following month that need to be added? Birthday party or lunch date with friends, etc. Can we take anything away from the previous month? Can we not spend 1000 dollars on date night. LOL. These are the basics. We do it a little differently at the beginning of the year by going over certain goals for the year and breaking them down.
Schedule
We schedule the month out in advance. What plans have we committed too. Are we going to stay at home and relax on our Saturday off or take the kids to do something, participate in the holiday adventures, etc. After we mark down our commitments we talk about date nights. It starts with the budget- what can we afford and how can we get creative to still spend time together. Can we afford a babysitter for 2 nights? Do we need to take the kids to our family for ~free~? After this is established we will actually contact the babysitters and get it on the calendar. This has been a really impactful way of ensuring we are putting our relationship first instead of getting lost in the craziness of parenthood and looking back thinking… wow it’s been six months since we have been on a date? What happened?
Relationship
We talk about the previous month and how we each felt about our relationship. What went well? What do we need to work on? How did we feel our communication was? Do we have goals for the next month? This section always looks different but it is a place of vulnerability and raw emotion. You have to be willing to accept that neither party will ever be perfect and you will both need to work on things and continue to better yourself for the rest of your relationship.
Overall goals
When we set our goals we try to break it down monthly. This allows us to see where are progress is and what our bandwith is for the following month. Whether its personal goals that you are holding eachother accountable for or goals that you have made together as a couple, financially, in parenting, or just in life.
If you aim to do something similar to this monthly you will see a huge positive impact in not only your relationship but also your organization and stress levels as well. Don’t get me wrong it looks perfect on paper but we are all living in the same crazy world – right? Sometimes this meeting happens in our bed at 8pm on a Sunday night because we couldn’t get away. Sometimes it takes the course of the week to hit all the topics. Sometimes its completely derailed due to a child waking up or overbooking yourself on the weekends. Sometimes we forget to even look at the budget until half way through the month. It happens, life happens, we are all out here just doing the best we can. You can do it, too!! Wake up 30 min early and have a coffee date on your couch and be intentional about your relationship and your life!
Xoxo,
Jess